BUKAN KARENA MATAMU SIPIT

The Nuts Admirer

The wind of dry season blows slowly and makes the bougainvillea flowers fall from its branch. The land looks so dry. I am alone walking in the park, waiting for Vicky, my classmate. I stop under a tree and recollect the conjuncture that irritated me.  Actually, it happens to me almost 24 hours a day and 7 days a week.

“Ehhmm, waiting for someone, Indie?” say the voice behind me that surprised me.

“By Jove! Vicky, you’re surprising me,” I exclaim at her.

“Why are you getting mad? I tried to wake you up from your daydreaming. Don’t be so serious to think of Calvin, Sweety.”

“Stop joking, Vick.”

“Alright, don’t be angry. I’m just kidding. But you know, Indie, do you ever think about him? I mean is why that Asian always makes you angry. You are the only girl in the campus with whom he always clashes. Do you ever think about it? I think he loves you.”

“Oh, shut up. I don’t know why he acts like that but believe me, whatever he does, I won’t move. David Guetta taught me that ‘shoot me down but I won’t fall, I am titanium’ hahaha. C’mon, we have to go to the railway station right now or we’ll lose the train.”

We will go to the downtown library. We have to go by train for quicker. I forget to introduce the guy we talked about. He is Calvin Zhang, Asian-American guy, my classmate, my admirer and also-unfortunately-my neighbor. We have known each other since two years ago when his family moved here. His parents are very good; I just don’t know why they have a son like him. He always disturbs me everytime in the campus. I know that he does it because he likes me, but I don’t give him any responses. I play possum, just feign ignorance.

That Bad Boy

With a board smile on his face, he waves his hands and waits for me in front of the canteen. Why him ask me in the heart. I have a bad feeling about it.

“How’s your day, Sugar?” Calvin follows me then sits beside me.

“Good. And yours?” I say it perfunctory.

“Mine is great. So what are you doing? Do you mind that I sit here? I think you don’t. So what will you order? Do you wanna eat or drink something?”

“Can you leave me alone, please? I need my own time.”

“Nope. I wanna sit here,” again he is smiling to me and I hate that smile.

“What’s wrong with you? Why can’t you just let me go and live normally without your vagaries around me?”

“Is it wrong if I interest in you? Can’t I? Are there any laws which interdict my feeling? That’s your fault, why you’re so pretty. Your risk if you are loved by me. If you’re ugly maybe I won’t look at you,” he says to me emotionless.

“You are…”

“…handsome? Hmmm, I know that,” he says presently before I finish my words.

He looks so happy did it for me. If he were a little bit cool and smart-just a little bit-maybe I would consider him to be my boyfriend. He never be serious of everything. He only knows how to have fun and teases people. I don’t know what happen with his brain when he just a boy that made him so nuts like this. I admit that he is handsome, but only that he has.

The Extension Course

It’s in the Language class when most of the students yawn and then start making noise. Professor Shaw walks slowly into the room with our examination papers in his hand. A few moments he tries to find something out from his bag. In the outside he just looks like an insane professor who never combs his hair, but in the inside he is Einstein.

“Mr. Evans, you have to equip your writings, I think you have a talent in writing but you should learn more,” he says to my friend who sits in the class corner then points at me, “So, congratulation…. Again…. For Miss Frost, you got A+.” Not surprising me, I always get the full marks in the class, too flat.

“WOW….! Congratulation Indie. Good job!” exclaim Calvin.

“Mr. Zhang, stop making noise and please improve your bad score. You got D- again. I don’t know whose faults it was but I have tried to give you my best,” Professor Shaw teases Calvin. “Ah, Miss Frost, can you teach Mr. Zhang about this subject after class? I need your help. I think it will be great if you help your friend to equip their scores. Yes, I think it is great idea, the smartest teaches the goofiest. Do you mind, Miss Frost?” Does he ask me? I only shake my head without a single word out of my mouth.

The time goes faster than I expected. I can’t go home sooner because of him, all over again because of him. Now I have to teach him.

“I am ready, Miss. What will we do?” still with that smile that I hate.

“Take your book and start our lesson.”

“Can’t you smile to me? Why do you hate me? Did I do the bad things to you that I never aware?” he looks at me but with a little disappointment in his face, “Or you don’t like me because I am different with you. Is it because I am an Asian?”

“Oh, shut up your mouth. I can’t bear it. I’m going,” I say it angrily. He runs after me and keeps on calling my name.

“Okay I’m sorry. Let’s try again. I promise I’ll be a good guy,” he says, looking up with his charming smile that I hate. “Hmm, that’s alright if you don’t like me. I can go with other girls. But it just a damn pity, no one as pretty as you here,” repeat him calmly. It’s not sounds angry or cross his heart.

We study for two hours. None of his tasks are settled. He is not enthusiasm of this studying at all. I waste my time with him. “How can you make a mistake in every number? You have to understand every single word. Do not focus on the structure only,” I give him a correction. “Are you sleeping?”

“Oh, no… of course I’m not. I just close my eyes a moment. But I’m fine,” he says and smiles again.

“Okay, I think you’re getting tired. We should stop here. We’ll continue it tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?” he exclaims surprisingly.

“Yup, we need to increase your scores. So we have to study hard.”

“I love spending the time with you, but I don’t like studying,” said Calvin with a yawn. “I know you do not like me because I am Asian and my eyes are slanted. Whatever.”

“Why don’t you study?” I am curious.

“Actually I am smart. I am brilliant. If I study hard I am afraid that I will grab your first rank in the class,” reply him lazily.

“Oh please don’t be back-down,” I turn and glance at him.

“Are you sure? If I can’t make you lose you can do whatever you want to me. But if you lose I want you to hang out with me in the prom night, deal?”

“Okay. Furthermore, it won’t happen.” I said it because I want him to be enthusiastic. No more. And I am sure that he can’t make me down easily. Just try and prove it. I am waiting for it. Good luck for him even if it’s impossible.

Startled

Two months rolls by. This is the time to know the result, I am or he is the winner. Actually I don’t care about the result, I just wanna know he did it or not. I go to the campus by bus this morning. On the bus I remember what happened during two months we spent the time together to prepare the final examination.

This is the story during two months ago. For about two months we spent the time together. He made the stupid things to disturb me. He never cared what I was saying; he only knew how to make me laughed. One night he took me to the cinema. I enjoyed it. He ever asked me something that shocked me. “Am I not your type?” he asked me.

“What?” I shocked my head. I didn’t understand what he said.

“You should’ve known that I like you. But I am still questioning about what type of guy that you like,” I knew he wasn’t serious to say that. “I am brilliant, I have a charisma. You are the only girl who never response me, though I’ve tried a zillion way. We have known each other more than two years. Don’t you have a feeling for me?”

I didn’t know what I had to say to him. He was too straight to the point, and he’ll always be like that. He said that I have no feelings for him because I don’t like Asian with their slanted eyes. It was irrational. “I don’t know, Calvin. It’s not about Asian or your slanted eyes. I don’t have any feelings to you because of you yourself. Maybe I would open my heart if you’re not you,” I said.

“What? Y-you make me confused. But, serious, I like you,” it sounded strange when he said that, he said it in a quavering voice. “Hahaha I don’t know what I shall do anymore. Shall I give up now?”

“If you wanna give up now, it’s up to you,” it became harder to say, I don’t know why. “But you promised me that I’ll ask you everything I want from you. Don’t forget it.”

If I remember the day when he said that he would give up on me, there is something in my heart rebelled. I felt that there is something was taken from my heart. I hope it will be different when I know the result of our examination. My heart beats faster than usual.

Now, I am in front of the board that shows the scores we got. I am not looking for my name, but his name. I check from the lowest ranks. Every number I check but I can’t find his name in the lowest ranks. Until my finger tip stop at number two, Calvin Liam Zhang. Incredible! Everybody is so surprise, so am I. It just like a dream he makes this big changing. From the bottom he can rise up to the top, the best second. The first place is won by me, Indie Alexandra Frost. He can’t shoot me down. I am still the winner.

I turn back and I see Calvin is standing behind me. “I lose, you win. Congratulation, what do you want? Just say what you’re gonna say,” he glances at me and smiling. I saw dissatisfaction in his eyes. He tries to back-down…. Again….

“You too. I will tell you my wish if I find something I need, but not now. So I think that we’ll go alone to the prom night.” I give him my best smiling, “Great jumping, buddy. You’re the runner up. You have proved me that you went from zero to hero. It was almost. One more step and you’ll get my place.”

Then, after an awful pause, his voice says, “But it’s still not enough to conquer your heart. Huaahm… you know, I become loving to study because of you. I did it because I want to be with you. I’ve failed. Impossible for me become your guiding star, Indie. Because my light won’t irradiate your heart at all times. I also won’t be the sun for you, because if it were too extreme, I am afraid it would burn you down. So I just wanna be the air around you, close to you without you had to realize that I am near, or just simply remember about me. Don’t have mercy on me. I’m okay.” He goes after he says that words. He really wants me. I don’t need to say anything now, at least not at this time.

His Slanted Eyes at the Prom Night

I put my best dress on tonight. I wanna do something in the prom.

I see Calvin with his coat looks so different, cool. His slanted eyes, I’ll never forget. His smile, I hate it. I hate his smile because it really takes my mind off. Oh-oh…. He smiles at me…. again…. With the same smile I ‘hate’.

“Hi, sugar. Beautiful,” I know he says it heartily. But his voice sounds awkward. I guess it because he lost the wager to reach the first rank in this last examination.

“Thanks’. You too. Looks different, cool.”

“Cool? Haha, thanks’ too. Finally, I couldn’t reach the first rank and of course your heart. Undefeated. Great!”

“Sure, I always be the winner and get what I wants,” I rise my left eyebrow up. He doesn’t understand what I mean yet. There is a beautiful interval between us, only stare in each other without a single word out of our tongue. “Okay, do you remember what did you say if I became the winner again?”

“Oh, sorry. Ya, I do remember. So, what do you wish me do?”

“You,” I point at him. He looks so confuse. He smiles uncertain. “Yes, you are. I wish that you’ll never give up on me. I wish you always love me and disturb me everytime, maybe forever.”

“Are you serious? But I think that you don’t like Asian. You don’t like my slanted eyes and I know that you ever said that you hate my smile. I think that you felt uncomfortable because I disturbed you. But you ask me to annoy you forever? You are joking. Aren’t you?”

“Moron. I did it because I really like you. I think we need more time, because I enjoy the time when you ran hard to touch my heart. The moment when you tried was the most romantic moment in my life so far,” I stop for a while for breathing. “There was something missing in my heart when you said that you would give up on me. You have succeeded from the first time. Calvin, you’ve done well.”

“Have I?” I know he can’t say anything.

“Moron. Shall we dance?”

He smiles at me, but he stops my step, “Wait, is it okay if I’m an Asian?”

“What are you thinking of? What’s the problem if my boyfriend is an Asian and he has the slanted eyes?” I don’t answer his question but I think he understands what I mean.

“Are you okay with my eyes?” he adds and smiles joking. Once more I don’t give him an answer, because I know he knows that I do love his slanted eyes. I take him to the dance floor. I wish that he will annoy me…. forever.

It's just a story. 

Created By:

OLvie Sipota